Here’s what’s trending in food right now:
I’ve been adding Sriracha to pho since college (I’m not willing to admit how long ago that was because it depresses me), so “Rooster Sauce” is nothing new to me and the rest of southern California. But lately the rest of the country has been caught up in Sriracha-nalia. Sriracha is everywhere you look, even in booze. That’s how you know it’s the next big thing, when it gets its very own vodka flavor. Move aside birthday cake flavored vodka, you make disgusting Blood Mary’s. Not that I tried, I’m just assuming.
Is it a donut or a croissant? It’s a cronut! I’m only assuming these are good because I’ve never had one. But how can you go wrong with donut meets croissant? You can’t, that’s how. This craze started on the east coast and swept westward across the country. I live in a foodie backwater, so like I said I’ve never had the pleasure of a cronut but I would really like to try one. I believe I would enjoy them quite a bit. My best bet is if a chain bakery, like Panera, starts making them. Then and probably only then will cronuts be available in Fresno. I take that back, Fresno did finally get some cupcake shops about one year after the cupcake fad settled down in the rest of the country. So I’ve only got to wait a year.
Korean Fusion Food
Korean fusion food is all the rage right now and it all started with a food truck in LA. Kogi’s Mexican Korean fusion menu sounds absolutely delicious. From the short rib sliders topped with sesame mayo to the chocolate tres leche cake with cocoa pebbles, spiced peanut brittle, cinnamon toast crunch, tapioca milk, and cinnamon and cayenne infused tres leches, this cake sounds like a stoner’s (and my) wet dream. I seriously want to jump in my car and drive to LA right now. Did I mention that they have Sriracha ganache dipped in dark chocolate? I mean, come on folks, Kogi food truck is America’s (and my) foodie wonderland. Like cronuts, I’ve never had Korean fusion before but I know it’s good because Korean food is delicious and I looked at the pictures and descriptions on the Kogi website and enjoyed it way too much. I actually felt kind of dirty and guilty looking at their website, like I had been caught looking at porn. That’s how good this food looks.
The Bacon Maple Bar at Voodoo Donut has always been one of their best sellers, proving that we’ve always loved bacon and novelty foods. But we pretty much have the You Tube sensation that is Epic Mealtime to thank (or blame?) for really bringing bacon to the public masses and releasing the bacon flavored floodwaters that have drowned our country. Denny’s, never one to back away from caloric overload, introduced their baconalia menu, including a maple bacon sundae. Not to be out done, Jack in the Box followed suit with a bacon milkshake. You can buy bacon deodorant, bacon floss, bacon perfume, and bacon flavored pretty much anything. Bacon is good, but seriously I think we’ve taken it way too far with the bacon obsession. Bacon, dudes wearing skinny jeans and/or scarves, and mustaches are all fads that can go away. Like, now.
AND THE UGLY
The best thing quinoa has given us is the best Bud Light commercial ever. Our obsession with quinoa has driven up the prices in the Andes so that the indigenous farmers who grow it as well as rely on it to battle malnutrition, can’t afford it now. I’m not a fan of that or of quinoa. I get it, quinoa is really good for you, but does it have to taste so much like dirt?
Like quinoa, it’s good for you but tastes gross. I’ll stick to spinach. And dark chocolate.